The Best Four Years of Your Life

Ladies and Gents, this week's Indie Ink Challenge prompt comes from my good friend Alyssa (which I knew would happen eventually, since I challenged her in her second week).  This week I tried to stray a bit from my comfort zone (which usually involves humor of some kind), so I hope that I've done her justice.  The prompt will be at the end. 

I challenged Sir for the second week in a row, so once you're done here, you can go on over there and see if he's surviving week #2 of Sunshine.

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Everyone sat sharp in their seats, straight backed, eyes forward, and hands fastidiously documenting everything being said.   She, on the other hand, sat in the back row, lounging disgracefully in her seat, picking at chipped nail polish, acting as if she were bothered to be in attendance.  To be honest, it wasn’t as if she had to be there; she chose to be.  It wasn’t as if anyone would mind if she left; they weren’t there for her entertainment.  

She listened, though, even as she appeared to be unfocused, she listened to the rest of the room talking in turn about things they’ve learned.  I’ve learned to do my homework. I’ve learned time-management.  I’ve learned that Liebler’s Shakespeare class is no joke. I’ve learned that I really need to do the readings.  I’ve learned that flirting with Jake in the Library is definitely worth it, since he does my algebra take-home tests.

She yawned and rolled her eyes, squirmed a bit, and took to drawing on the toe of her black Converse sneaker.

A hushed silence came over the room, making her look up from her own little world.  The professor repeated the question directed at her:  what have you learned throughout your college career, young lady?

She sat quietly for a moment, determining whether or not she’d like to share.  

The silence became uncomfortable.   Really uncomfortable.  

When finally they couldn’t take anymore, the other students started to whisper in low murmurs, which might have caused them to miss the beginning of what she had to share.

 “A lot, actually.  I've learned that having a roommate is supremely unexciting.  I’ve learned that no one is going to have your back 100% of the time.  I’ve learned that drinking at a frat party while you’re pledging a sorority is only what the sheep do to pretend that they’ve got personality.  I've learned that the kid who sits in the back of my Spanish lecture really hates to be called “Jose” when his name is “Joe”, but puts up with it because he needs a good grade.  I’ve learned that the only place you can get a decent cup of coffee is from the kiosk in the lobby of university hall, and the only people who visit the “Red Hawk Diner” are freshman or drunk.

I’ve learned that I am smarter than some of my professors, and have been since I was in the 7^th grade. I’ve learned that all the classes that I’ve taken during my 4 years of college are complete bullshit, and that they’re not going to help me in the slightest when I get “into the real world”.  I’ve learned that time management is a necessary evil, and that it is really the only useful thing I’ve gotten out of my education.

You know what I would have liked to learn?  That I should have saved my money for a place to live when I find out that I’m not going to be able to get a decent job right after graduation.   What would have helped would be taking classes on how to interview, how to impress potential employers, and how to develop self-confidence rather than fear.  I would have liked to learn that someone in the school system cared for something more than their paycheck.  I would have liked to learn of someone who was there to guide and advise students as to what field they might be interested in studying, or what kind of life they'd like to lead once they graduated.  

It would have been helpful to learn that after high school, the next four years of my life would be spent doing bullshit busy work that old rich people find acceptable in exchange for taking $20,000 dollars of me and my parents’ hard earned money, not just now, but for the next ten years.  That’s what I would have liked to learn.  Thanks a million, Useless State University”.

The class was stunned into silence.  No one said a word, just letting her words sink in... until someone on the other side of the room said, "thank you, valedictorian of 2011."  

She went back to drawing on her shoe. 

***

Alyssa's prompt to me was: let's talk about college. write a story, fact or fiction, about the most important thing you gained/earned/received from those "best four years of your life.".