So then I said...

I don't really have a whole lot to update because nothing exciting is going on in my life (which isn't really far from the usual, Peeps, as you loyal followers already know).  However, in the last few days I've had some great conversations (in person as well as via text) and felt I NEEDED to share them with you.

***
Dad: I'm hungry, but it's Lent. Can't eat meat, it's Friday.
Val:  Why do you follow that stupid rule anyway?
Dad: Valerie, it's not stupid.
Val: Your people aren't going to let me into your Heaven, so I'm not following the rules.
Dad: You're going to Heaven.
Val: They don't let my kind in there.
Dad:  I got you a pass. You're going.

***

L: I want to be part of a drag show.
Val:  You already look like a dude.
L:  I know, but it's different.
Val:  How is it different?
L:  Well, they draw mustaches on you, and side burns.
Val: You. Already. Look. Like. A. Dude.  To be part of a drag show, you'd need to wear a dress.
L: I am not wearing a dress; I want to be a drag KING.
Val:  That's like going to a masquerade ball and not wearing a mask!  Idiot.
L:  You just don't understand.
Val:  No, you just don't understand that I'm right.
L: Right.

***

Val: Um, I just got tipsy with my uncle and my sister at a bar.
Susie: Um, can I just tell you that I spilled the blue lava lamp juice on the floor... BFF's mom is going to kill me.
Val: OMG.
Susie:  I know.
(The next day.)
Susie: BFF and I should become professional carpet cleaners.

***
Missvalsunshine, offending the masses since 1985.

Buttercream Wishes and Piggy Bank Dreams

Yep -- You read it right.  This week Val challenged herself to the small endeavor of learning how to Cake Decorate (along with the help, patience, and guidance of her favorite up-and-coming Cake Decorator, Caroline, owner and proprietor of Cakes by Caroline).

I baked them the night before - I was dedicated!

I carted them wrapped in tinfoil across half the state of NJ and into NY State.

Car doesn't fuck around - she's got tools!

I did the grass.  It's not as easy as she made it out to be. 

We ended up with a menagerie of Piggy Bank cupcakes (which may or may not have saved my ass from getting many tickets after being pulled over that day) and everyone thought I bought them at the bakery.

Obviously after we were finished, it was time to get silly with the Icing.

Finally, this is how I carted them home... no judging!

All in all, it was an awesome experience, one I'm super excited to replicate again, and it was with an amazing friend with the patience of a saint. <3

Anyone in the Tri-State area wanting or needing a cake should definitely contact Caroline.  http://www.facebook.com/Cakes.By.Carolinee

My Heart's a Stereo.

I dreamed of you last night.

I knew it was a dream the minute I saw what you were wearing: a Yankees hoodie and a Red Sox baseball hat, and in what reality would that ever happen? 

Right, I thought not.

You huffed and puffed around some train station parking lot on the way to a game, fuming that your sister invited me along, steam billowing out your ears.  My subconscious took a little satisfaction in that, I have to admit. 

Even my sleeping brain knows that I'm missing my friend, and the pleasure I used to take in torturing you relentlessly. 

You asked me, before our friendship finally deteriorated, why I hadn't yet trashed you on my blog, and I gave you an answer.  The truth, though, is not as simple as I had let on, but the context remains the same. 

I love you.  

You're a pain in the ass.  You know it, I know it, and if the rest of the world could know you, they'd know it, too.  I've never had any misgivings about the person you are, and you never changed yourself once from the beginning.  You came as is.

I love you, and I had from the beginning, though it took until after the end to realize what kind of love it truly was.  You were part of my life, maybe not for a long time, but it's quality not quantity, and I have a hole in some kind of part of me that is still empty, because it was one that you used to fill.  Was it romantic love, no not really; I think it was more than that. It was knowing that I had an honest friend, a person who I could count on to listen, cheer me up, and laugh with me. It was having someone share my secrets, understand my weird, random, eccentric thoughts and not judge me on them.  

You decided that it would be easier (for you, I'm assuming, since you didn't really give me any options whatsoever) if we didn't talk anymore.  It killed me. It tore me up inside, because the only person I've wanted to call and talk to is the one who wants nothing to do with me anymore. 

I hope this is turning out just how you wanted.  I'll miss you, and so you know, I've still never let you down.  

Just sayin'.